Goodell Wants To Hug You, And Now He Can

It was the question on everyone’s mind: Will Roger Goodell be able to hug the draftees this year? And we finally have an answer. Yes. Yes. A hundred times YES! Someone has to be there to usher these kids into their new lives and if it wasn’t going to be this buffoon with a giant bear hug, I wasn’t going to watch!

Because you bet your ass I wasn’t sitting through another draft of these awkward ass interactions..

BUT NOW, goodbye weird TV hugs, hello weird…normal interactions!

This is the first draft in the last 20 years that myself and many other Patriots fans will actually have a severe, unhealthy investment in, so it’s good to know that good ol Rog will be able to wrap his grubby little shitstained mits around whoever the Pats decide to take at 15, or 8, 7 or whichever other pick Belichick hopefully wants to trade up to in order to get Justin Fields. I’ll tell you, this worrying about who your team will draft as a QB shit is trash. It’s a horrible stressor that I don’t need right now. Ugh, how do you other fans do this so much?

Anyway, what are the odds of a draftee just cold cocking that snivelling little shit when they get on stage? I know it won’t happen, but I’d like it to. A man can dream I guess.

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