Did Tom Brady Just….

Cum?

Tom Brady definitely just busted all up in his special little TB12 boxers, right? That GIF has never not meant that you just came looking at something because it was so awesome. What the hell man? Who sent that tweet? I have to know. Was it Brady? His intern? Gisele? Did Belichick hack in?

This is just weird, no matter which way you slice it. First of all, it’s just a couples soft ass floaters into easy coverage during practice. Is that climax worthy? I’d say no, but Tampa Tom is a different cat. Tampa Tom doesn’t listen to COVID guidelines. Tampa Tom is finally having fun now that he went to a shitty team and doesn’t have to worry about big bad Bill bossing him around forcing him to win game after game after game on the way to obtaining more success than anyone at his position. Tampa Tom sucks.

Standing back and seeing what all you people have seen for years, I understand how this guy is insufferable. Don’t get me wrong, I love him for what he did for my Patriots and how much joy he’s brought me. That’ll never be forgotten. But this is business my friend. if you’re not with us you’re against us getting your rocks off while watching practice videos of yourself and sharing it with the Twitterverse.

There’s an age limit for cum jokes, and Brady is well past that. Once you hit 40, you’re legally no longer allowed to joke about ejaculate or the act of ejaculating ever when in public. Behind closed doors? Get wild! But no jack off jokes in public Tom, come on now.

Picturing Tom Brady shooting his GOAT-like semen over a video of himself playing football isn’t where I thought I’d be tonight, but yet here we are. Thanks 2020.

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