Don’t Shove This Up Your Penis

We all have our kinks. In the year 2020, you can be as out in the open as you want when it cums to what you like in the bedroom.

But that being said, nothing stops us from commenting on said kinks. And I feel like this is a kink that needs to be discussed.

“…an x-ray revealed the man to have a two-foot-long charging cable in his bladder — inserted via his urethra, the tube that leads from the penis to the bladder.”

So..like most people, I draw a line at certain things. And at the very, very top of that list is shoving anything, anything at all, up my penis. I don’t care if you told me it would turn me into Spiderman and I’d become a living version of Peter Parker, nope. Not doing it. And I LOVE Spiderman, but still, that’s strictly an exit for me. No entry past that point.

But since you should always try to look at things from a different point of view, if you are going to shove an object up there, wouldn’t you want it to be something you could just like, pop on in? How in the hell do you shove a TWO FOOT LONG CHARGER up there!?

I’m wincing just typing this! How do you just sit there and shimmy that cord up there until it’s gone. Charger head and everything! Was it even his charger!? Cause that’s a real son of a bitch move to steal someone else’s charger and when they ask for it you just smirk and look down at your dick. That must’ve been a confusing conversation to have.

Two. Feet. Long. I can’t imagine.

What was the end game here? Did he actually think he was going to just shit this out and then he’d try a bigger cord? Maybe those 5 foot ones you can get at Walmart perhaps. This begs the question though: did he start at this lenght? Was he shoving those tiny 5 inch cords up there first just to get a hand of it and what angles to take? Because if this is your first time shoving a cord up your dick hole, starting with a two-footer is about as ballsy as you can get.

I just thought about this and now so do you: what if he shoved it up there just so the plug side for the phone was…hanging out…and he plugged his phone in and just left it there. And then what if he had one of those smaller portable chargers inside him along with the rest of the cord? That’d be a wild sight, huh? An iPhone X hanging from a dingaling. Crazy.

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