NFL Kicks Off With The Worst Opener These Eyes Have Ever Seen

What the hell did I just watch? Was this a preseason game? Why did neither team look like they came out ready to play a game? They know this counts now, right?

With this year being the 100th Anniversary of the NFL, Roger Goodell decided to open up with the leagues ‘oldest rivalry’ in Green Bay and Chicago. Which makes sense because this game sent the NFL back 100 years. My god was this a horrible display of skill from both teams. I’m sorry but I don’t have time to sit here and wait for you remember that the games count now. I have far too many shows to catch up on.

First of all, starting the year without your Super Bowl Champion playing opening night is ridiculous. This game should have been the Steelers taking on the Patriots in a contest that undoubtedly would’ve blown the doors of this horrendous performance. Those games are legitimately always entertaining. Every single time. There’s actually a rivalry there too, which is what I thought the league was going for….

I can’t remember the last time a Bears vs Packers game had me on the edge of my seat. Sure, this WAS a rivalry decades ago, but as of late, this has been at the bottom of the totem pole when it comes to rivals. Half the people watching this game weren’t even alive during the years these teams played competitive, meaningful football against each other. But hey, it’s the oldest rivalry though!

Secondly, the play from both sides was atrocious. I don’t think Mitch Trubisky has a complete grasp on how to play the quarterback position. It’s bad when you have people saying Jay Cutler would be a better choice to be in this game than you.

Mitchy Twinkle Toes seems terrified in the pocket and just can’t seem to do anything right most of the time. He just always seems to be making the wrong play at the wrong time. I thought he was going to get better this season but this just looks like more of the same. Almost a regression actually.

And what was all this hooplah I heard about this brand spankin’ new LaFleur offense? The Green Bay Packers looked like what they have looked like for the last 6 years. Aaron Rodgers drops back, goes through 2 or 3 reads, scrambles out of the pocket and plays some backyard football and more often than not gets sacked.

Speaking of the fake #12, how many throws did this putz miss tonight? I stopped counting at 8..and that was just in the first half! I get that he didn’t play in the preseason but still, if you’re supposed to the THIS good, how can you look THIS bad. I think I’m ready to say this: I don’t get the hype about Aaron Rodgers. He had a few great years and won a Super Bowl so far back most people forget. He can chuck a hail mary with the best of ’em, sure. He can scramble around all day if he needs to. But when you actually watch and entire Packers game, I just don’t get it. THIS is the guy people are calling the GOAT? How? I know Max Kellerman is obsessed with Tom Brady’s cliff, but maybe it’s time we start talking about how close Rodgers is to his own cliff.

Also, this goes for both sides, how the hell do you get SO many delay of game penalties!? That, to me, is the sign of a team that is just not ready to go. And both sides just couldn’t help it. I don’t know what the over-under was for delay of game penalties but it’s safe to say both these QB’s had the over.

This was also a game where we had a 1st & 40. FORTY YARDS! Seriously.

Back to Aaron though. On one of his deep balls he completed earlier in the game, that thing hung up there for a whiiiiiiiile. I’m not sure how it didn’t get picked. And then the TD to Graham in the first half was one of those ‘panic and chuck it up there hoping your guy comes down with it’ throws which Brady get’s killed for. But yet when Rodgers did it, Collinsowrth practically cummed himself saying “That’s Rodgers just trusting his guy to make a play!”

This game wasn’t a complete embarrassment though. Both defenses looked pretty good. Now, was that because the offenses were playing like they didn’t know this game was coming? Maybe. But still, I love a good defensive game. But I think that’s why I couldn’t find myself getting into this game though. It wasn’t so much as a defensive struggle as it was just a complete team struggle from both sides. The actual play on the field was laughable. Dropped passes, missed throws, whiffed blocks, we had it all here.

If you were an alien dropped her from another planet that also loved football, you’d have a tough time believing that both of these teams are in the discussion to make the Super Bowl this year. The Bears and Packers looked like teams that would barely even be above .500!

So while the Packers ultimately won and the Bears took the L, the real loser of the night is us. You and me. We sat through an entire offseason of storyline after storyline getting us more hyped with each passing day for when our beloved NFL would finally come back to us, and this is what we’re given. A knock off version of what a regular season opener should be. Oh well, see ya Sunday. Football is back, I guess.

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