Working On The 4th Of July Should Be Illegal

The 4th of July is a National Holiday. Not only is it Captain Americas birthday, but it could actually be called the most national out of all the holidays. This is the day we broke free from England and told them to shove their tea and crumpets cause prefer beer and hot dogs.

And beer and hot dogs is what we all should be enjoying today.

Maybe you go to the beach. Maybe you have a party at your house or a friends. Either way, today is a day that should be dedicated solely to drinking and eating too much, maybe even taking a nap, and then watching fireworks* to wrap everything up.

*Quick little sidenote here: I hate fireworks. I don’t get them. I don’t even remember really liking them when I was a kid. Save for the random time where you get an attempt at an image that never really looks like anything, they all look the same! Everyone just stares at the sky going “ooohhh” and “aaaahhhh” like a bunch of idiots. The only age group that really likes them are like..ages 5-9. Younger kids just cry at the noise and become a nuisance while older kids would rather be doing ANYTHING else than standing with their family watching lights in the sky. No more fireworks. I just never understood ’em.

Anyway, like I said, today should be spent outside, surrounded by friends, just enjoying the day. But what’s your boy doing? The opposite.

I’m used to working holidays, don’t get me wrong. It took me half a year in sales to know that I don’t get regular day offs or weekends like normal people do. Weekends? What are those. Days like Memorial Day or 4th of July off? Nope. Just regular days to me! The only time I know I get off are Easter (no idea why this one makes the list), Thanksgiving, Christmas and SOMETIMES New Years Day.

But after 5 years of having to work on the 4th, I’ve had enough. I’m sick of seeing people post videos and pictures to Instagram, Facebook or Snapchat showing how much fun they’re having. Or everyone taking pics of their red, white and blue attire/drinks.

Do you know how frustrating it is at noon to know that almost everyone I know is enjoying their first drink of the day while I’m sitting here dealing with a customer that “has to keep looking” because they “don’t like to make a snap decision on something so big” even though they’ve just wasted 5 hours with me going back and forth over if they want power seats or not. I’ve had enough.

Customers that come in to buy a car on the 4th are always annoying anyway. They’re either losers who don’t like fun and have no one to celebrate with or it’s a mom and dad who drag out their kids just to bitch and complain the whole time. STAY HOME! ENJOY THE DAY OFF!

Trust me, any customer that I talk to today is NOT gonna get my A game. And I know that’s a shitty thing to say as a salesman but hey, it is what it is. You think I wanna sell the ‘sizzle’ of a base model Hyundai Accent to you? Nope. I’d rather be 5 beers in playing (losing) cornhole.

So if you have today off, cherish it. Because you could be like me or any other unfortunate souls and have to slave away at a job that no one really wants to be at today. Eat. Drink. Have fun. And if you are forced to watch fireworks later, I feel sorry for you.

Happy 4th of July you lucky sons of bitches.

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