And Your New Batman Is….

Robert Pattinson. Robert fucking Pattinson.

Listen, I don’t wanna hear any shit about him ‘growing into a great actor’ or how ‘you never know how an actor is gonna do in a role’. Don’t wanna hear ANY of it.

Do me a favor, close your eyes and think of Robert Pattinson. What comes to mind?

God damn Edward from Twilight. Is DC kidding with this shit!? Because how they’ve handled their cinematic universe up until now has been a catastrophe. Add this casting on top of it and you’ve now just cast a very weird cloud over your most popular character.

There are some actors out there that, fair or not, will always be known for one role.

Daniel Radcliffe will always be Harry Potter. Elijah Wood will never not be Frodo. Hugh Jackman was made to be Wolverine. RDJ is Iron Man. For better or worse, these actors along with many more, will always be viewed as their iconic roles.

Robert Pattinson is a pussy ass vampire. He is NOT Bruce Wayne and he sure as hell will never be the Caped Crusader.

The more I think about this the more upset I get. There were so many better choices!

Armie Hammer

Jon Hamm

Luke Evans

Jamie Dornan

You know who would’ve been at the bottom of my list? Anybody from Twilight.

Has he gotten better since then? Probably. I mean, he had to. The acting in those movies were terrible. But that’s not really the point.

The role of Batman is sacred. It’s almost like James Bond in that way. When you take that role you go down in history. And now, because of DC, we’re gonna have to tell our kids about the dark days where Robert Pattinson played Batman.


P.S. The people posting random pictures of Robert Pattinson looking all dark in mysterious in a random photo shoot or something need to stop. You can make anyone look dark and intimidating in a doctored up picture. Imagine this pale faced fairy striking fear into the heart of Gotham City.

Ugh. This is why Marvel is better.

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