How Dumb Is Florida?

Well this is a new low for a state that I already know is filled with morons. Spelling is tough right? I mean, not for me, as I was always first or second in all my middle school spelling bees. But I imagine it’s tough for people. Some words have silent letters that shouldn’t be there or look nothing like they sound. Phlegm. Nauseous. Paraphernalia. Even Wednesday is a tough one at first. But then there are some words that are almost too easy to spell.

I mean…there’s no excuse for this. I guess this happened in a place called Doral, which is such a dumb name for a town. It sounds like the state city/town namers were just making random noises with their mouths and thought “hey, I know you were just gargling some beer, but what was that sound you just made? Doorrrraaalllll? That’s it!” Guess where Doral is located by the way? Of course, Florida. Fucking Florida.

School is not a tough word to spell. It’s literally the name of the place where you should learn to spell it. It’s 6 letters. Yeah, there are some 6 letter words that suck, but school is most certainly not one of them. The fact that no one pointed this out while it was being done proves that either the majority of people in Florida are sub par in the knowledge department or they’re all just too scatterbrained to pay attention to their job. I vote for the former if we’re being honest.

I can imagine the guy who did this finally finishing his job, which no doubt took him hours to accomplish. I mean, we’re talking SIX whole letters here. You know he sat back and looked at the word he created, spelled it in his head and was just like “Yep. Perfect. Good job buddy. Now let’s go grab a few beers, you’ve earned it.” Meanwhile people walking by probably didn’t want to say something cause THEY probably thought to themselves, “S-C-O-H-O-L, huh, that’s weird, never seen that before. Oh no, that must be a new word. Wonder what it means. I’ll have to look it up tonight when I get home!”

With every day that passes, I genuinely ask myself why I live in a state full of weirdos and people who can’t spell if their life depended on it. I haven’t even done a blog about how these shitheads drive, or try to drive. Or how the traffic lights in Orlando are so out of sync that you can sit at a light for literally 8 minutes while everyone around you gets a chance to go twice before your light changes color.

Tune in next time when I write about something else that some imbecile (now THAT is a tough word to spell) did in this ass-backwards state.

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