Did you guys think I wasn’t gonna blog about this shit? God damn work got in my way, otherwise this would have been up HOURS ago. But anyway, wow, who knew so much would be made about a guy getting a little rub and tug at a massage parlor am I right?

Now don’t get me wrong, I understand the optics of all this. Bob Kraft gets caught getting happy endings at a massage parlor that has been under investigation for human trafficking/prostitution for a month now. It doesn’t look good at all. But lets actually use our brains here and think about this rationally for a minute okay? Which I know will be hard for most of you since this has to do with the Patriots.

Does anyone for a second ACTUALLY think that Kraft is involved in the alleged human trafficking or whatever the fuck else this place is being accused of? You literally have to be a braindead moron or just have an ax to grind with the Pats if you genuinely believe that. I mean come on now, that is a GIANT leap to make from a man who was just trying to get his jollies off to thinking that he is somehow deeply involved in this shitshow. Use your brains one time for me, please.

You know why this is being made into a big deal? Because the New England Patriots are involved. Don’t kid yourself and think otherwise. If this was the owner of ANY other team it would be quietly covered by new outlets and then passed over in a day or so. I guarantee you this is a MAJOR story for weeks. You’ll have fucktards like Nick Wright saying Kraft should be suspended for a year at least.

You’ll have that dumbass Shannon Sharpe talking about the ‘integrity of the league’ and all that, while he is best friends with Ray Lewis who FUCKING MURDERED SOMEONE AND DESTROYED THE EVIDENCE! Skip Bayless on the other hand will say something like “this is why I never liked the Patriots themselves! I only respect Brady, the rest of the team I just cannot respect!”

You’ll have Stephen A making this into a race thing for no reason and talking in his ‘low and serious’ voice, all while Max Kellerman somehow relates this back to Brady’s ‘cliff’.

And don’t even get me started with what Rob Parker is going to say. Although I won’t know for sure because he blocked me on twitter like a little pussy boy. He’ll want the Patriots out of the league and all their rings taken back and wiped from the record books!

You have idiots like Bart Scott saying that the Patriots should lose all of their draft picks for this. You can tell he used to play for the Jets can’t you? He also played with Ray Lewis who, like I said earlier, killed a man.

I’m also seeing people blame this on the fact that Kraft is now heavily involved in the hip-hop culture. This could definitely be a factor. My sources are telling me that Kraft may actually be featured on a Meek Mill track in the near future so who knows, maybe Meek introduced him to this place and Mr. Kraft discovered a kinky side to him he never knew was there? #GangstaLife

This type of shit has been going on for decades by the way, centuries even! Its America’s oldest profession for crying out loud! That does not make it legal obviously, even though it IS legal in Vegas. This is like weed. Eventually its gonna to be legal everywhere. You are paying for a service. I’m sorry but when did paying for a service become this crazy crime!? Its like going to Wal-Mart to buy groceries..except in this case the groceries are a woman (or man, whichever floats your boat) and your shopping cart is your car/bed/park bench/wherever else you’d like to do your business.

The only strange part really, to me, is why would a Billionaire (big B) be slumming it in at a random massage parlor at a strip mall when he could literally pay the highest amount possible for the most elegant, professional prostitute in all the land? Hey, everyone has their kinks. Maybe Mr. Kraft likes to see how the other side lives and likes to pretend that he’s a regular 9-5 Joe blow who is just trying to relieve some stress at the end of his day. Who knows!? No one does really except Robert and the lovely ladies who serviced him.

Want to know the most unsurprising thing out of all of this? I’ll give you one guess where this place is located: Florida. Fucking Florida. I told you in my first blog ever that Florida is where all the weird shit goes down. This just proves my point! Jupiter, Florida is where the owner of the Patriots decided to go to get a little something extra after his massage. Amazing. Florida really never ceases to amaze me. What a shitshow of a state.

In all seriousness though, if this place is guilty of what it is being accused of, then that is a real problem and everyone involved should be held responsible. And if Bob Kraft had knowledge and/or participated in the heinous (holy shit, spell check didn’t even know what the hell I was trying to spell the first few times there) crimes this parlor is accused of, then he needs to be held responsible as well.

Anyway, this is going to float around for a while, so to all my Patriots fans…stay strong. We have dealt with much worse. Remember Aaron Hernandez? Yeah, THAT was a real problem. This is just a small molehill of a story that is going to get made into a mountain just because there are some serious allegations being thrown at the actual place where all this was going down. Let all the jealous simpletons blow this out of proportion because that are always hopelessly reaching for something to bring down this dynasty.

We will move on. We will keep winning. And you all will still bitch and moan about every little thing that this franchise is involved it. Its all good.

Lions don’t worry about the opinions of sheep.

But like liked I said, people are going to jump to outrageous conclusions here. And bring up a bunch of random shit and get their panties in a bunch if you try to say otherwise. This is one of those cases where if you argue in favor of Kraft then you’ll be labeled as someone who is pro human trafficking. Which is absurd.

All this is taking shine away from the fact that Devin McCourty has confimed he is coming back for the 2019 season baby! #LFG #CummingFor7

One thought on “#TheTugRule

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